I no longer wear the rose-colored glasses,
But catch a glimpse of you through
An disposal polaroid camera.
My heart bottled up so much sauded feeling,
It no longer shifts time and space
Or turn into a singularity,
Where you despise me with every fiber of your being,
Just to tell me the palm trees will never grow in my heart.
Leaving me with a scar//derealization,
You burn all the epistles.
You lived in the grief avenue for so long,
You forgot to tell me how it's like to withhold,
And your revelation about being apathetic,
Still shakes my core.
I float in the mossy river behind the borstal,
where I grew up to be someone I knew I would be.
Denial got my father's bones,
And felo-de-se got my mother's spine.
Still two sleepless nights I swayed.
Distorted VHS tape full of memories on a CRT,
How can I let go of your lackadaisical arms,
Where you hold me tight and the warmth
Reminds me of the time, when I fell from a sky
And landed on a muddy puddle.
Your resentments felt like white noises on a rainy Sunday,
Times when I imagined the sky was crying, and,
It was raining in this room.
So I took a shelter under a red phonebooth.
You write a verdict on a wax paper using the rusty typewriter,
That we eradicate ourselves,
Under the zenith blue moon.
After that, last atom of our body gets absorbed,
By the polychrome of the CRT.
